Thursday, September 9, 2010

GAH! I'm being crushed by fans!

Holy, f-ing, crap.

Okay, first off, DO NOT FLAME THIS VIDEO! Seriously, leave the kid alone, I'm not kidding about this. Unless you have something nice to say or something helpful DON'T WRITE IT! Something tells me this kid gets picked on a lot, leave him alone.

Now, watch this horror:

Okay, yeah, wow, I'm scared. I've been getting A LOT more annoying people on steam, skype, and in various games lately. This needs to stop.

First off, I'm glad my fans enjoy talking to me, I enjoy talking to you too. Most of you are really nice, I've played some great games with you guys. HOWEVER, I am not your digital jester! Do not join me in a game and ask me to say lines or dance or do tricks! I will become very annoyed as will everyone else on the server.

Also, on that note, don't message me with nothing important to say. I will block you! I'm so tired of fans messaging me with a conversation something like this (grammar improved for readability):

Log onto steam....5 seconds later:
Kid: "Hey Barney"
Kid: "Hey, you there?"
Kid: "Hey, what's up?"
Kid: "Hey..."
Me: "Hi"
Kid: "Hey, so, you want to play opposing force?"
Me: "Not really."
Kid: "Hey? Want to join me in voice chat?"
Starts a voice chat request without waiting for an answer.
Me: "Can't, busy."
Kid: "Hey, say "I hate bees"."

Seriously, if you see me online and want to ask a quick question, go ahead. If you see me in a game that isn't full, feel free to join. If you're playing with me you can ask stuff regarding the series' in the text chat but LEAVE THE VOICE CHAT ALONE! That will just piss off everyone else because they will have no idea what you're talking about, bonus hatred points if you have a really young, high-pitched, annoying voice.

Secondly, don't ask a question that has been asked a million times and is easy to find. The one exception to this is when will an episode be released. I don't mind this if you ask it politely, most of the time though I will ignore it if it's been a while (or hardly at all) since my last episode and the question has probably been answered on my blog or on the last video/trailer.

Finally, don't be such idiots! GAH! I'd lose faith in the world with all you people if I didn't already think it was full of morons. So many stupid people asking obvious questions, doing retarded things, and just being idiots. I mean, come on, if in real life you met a big super star would you ask him to say his favorite catch phrase or do a funny dance or talk to you all night. NO! (Well, you probably would, but you're an idiot if you think that's an acceptable thing to do!) No! If you want to be friends with someone then be their friend, don't be an ass. Also, if you want to just say "hi" then JUST SAY HI! Don't try to bug me with crap that just wastes my time!

Okay, now, about that video. Holy crap! That kid is scary looking, I mean, wow, has he EVER gone outside? What the hell is wrong with his parents? Dude! Get some exercise! Run around! MOVE! Also, FOR FUCKS SAKE! I'm not some crazy superstar! Why do you want to talk with me, I'm just some dude from Maine who decided to parody Ross Scott! This is just creepy. Oh well, I remember him from the game and he wasn't too first. I'm not sure if he got muted but I'm pretty sure me or another admin warned him for mic spamming. Ugh, this is just wrong on so many levels.

I don't know what else to say.

Oh, in regards to Harrison's Mind, it's coming slowly. VERY, very slowly. I've been busy as usual plus I've just not had that much time for it. Been chatting with CyhAnide a lot on Skype and hanging out with some friends and just kind of getting other things done at the moment. Also, in October I'm going to be going to California for a weekend so that (and the prep for that) are going to cut into it even more. I'll try to finish it as soon as I can though.

P.S. Got a new Logitech G500 mouse this morning, about time I replaced that crappy 5-button, generic M$ mouse I've had for 5 years.

P.P.S. Tacos for the emperor! ^_^

P.P.P.S. My girlfriend is amazing, I love her so much.


  1. hey ian what do you think of youtube adding a watermark to all vids?

  2. hey now, please don't come back from California with their vibe. you know lose a billion pounds and look like a robot-skeleton. any ways great work, hope you have a great time in California

  3. hmm. guess the whole relationship thing worked out. grats.


  4. HAHA Ian, feeling celebrity pressure? lol. btw congrats on getting a new girl!

  5. IAN! I... JUST... CAN'T... EAT... THAT... MANY... TACOS!!! No matter how delicious!! *feels very fat*

  6. Hi. People shouldn't be treating you like some kind of puppet. And it's good to see that you're still keeping up with Harrison's Mind. It looks epic to me.

    Also, congrats on the new relationship. Hopefully, everything will work out right.

  7. *smirk* You're SO popular.

    But seriously...that was...unsettling.

    Yes. Unsettling is the word I'm looking for. I could use more invective but I feel like being nice tonight.

    I kinda wanna do a parody of that now. Because I talk to you all the time. I dunno if that would be in bad taste...nor am I certain that I care...

    "OH. MY. GOODNESS. Guys, you're not gonna believe what just happened: I got to talk to IRAMightyPirate for the 258th time! Really! No, really! I'm totally super-special-awesome serious here! Not even ten seconds ago, we were talking about bees. IT. WAS. AWESOME-SAUCE! ...And then he blocked me. *sad face*"

    The internet is destroying the etiquette of interpersonal relationships, by the way.

    Oh, and congrats on the new girlfriend! She sounds so awesome. She and I might get along... (~_~; I need more real friends.) *chuckle* And you were so freaked out just last week...silly Pirate.

  8. Ooo, it looks like you had a very good time with your girlfriend. I guess everything worked out for you and your girlfriend.

    And I agree with you, Cyh. It was unsettling. The internet really destroys the etiquette of interpersonal relationships.

  9. Man does that suck, eh what are you going to do little kids in there mind think your probably never get that.

  10. @Psymon: MUAHAHHAAHAH! Tacos for everybody!

    @Cyh: Hah, that would be hilarious but probably in poor taste. Especially since everyone would ask what it's a parody of and then go flame the poor kid. Heheh, still, it would be funny.

    I wonder if we should ever do something with our crazy late-night antics? hah, like some kind of weird 4 am crazyfest. Everything is better at 4 am :)

    Thanks! I think you and her would get along real well, you're a lot alike in many ways. And, yes, I was freaked out but that's only because I think my inner mind was rejecting someone that it knew I would fall in love with almost immediately (or was already in love with and wasn't able to admit it) so it caused as much panic as possible to try and stop it. I'm all better now though thanks, in part, to your great advice. ^_^

    @Rallinale: Yep! She's awesome, maybe I'll show you guys a picture of her sometime. Or not, she's very shy. (and I want to keep all her pictures to myself. No touchy! :P)

    @Anon: What? Punctuation man, punctuation! It's your friend. I honestly have no idea what you're saying.

  11. This video will be a permanant mind fuck. Just the very thought, that somebody could willingly allow themselves to fall into such a state of unhealth as that child, is disturbing. This couldn't have happened overnight, he must have been slowly widening over the course of years... just watching, knowing what was happening, but being to distracted by his virtual self to care about his actual self. I no longer have faith in the human race's ability to control itself.

  12. I never talk when I play with you, I feel like a loser cause...well I do

  13. @everyone talking about "internet etiquette"

    There is no internet etiquette! lol.

    @Ian I will pick on this kid if I want to!

    @Everybody, I think ppl r taking this a little out of proportions. I mean yes, this kid is a greasy fuck. But c'mon. Ian, u r what ppl call a "intelebrety." In other words: An internet celebrety. So ppl find it cool to see u guys in a game or whatever. Don't take it so personally.

    *prepares for instant verbal abuse* Bring It! JK.

  14. well ian if i had counter strike source and i played you i would try not pester you but i would probly make a video talking about playing you.

    and thats my ramble of the day

    ps. if you wish to play me im at delta force 2 (yes there are people that still play df2)

    banjo tooie

  15. Twinkies vs Hostess Cupcakes!

    -Random Vs Guy

  16. With this hangover I am presently feeling, I could so use a taco right now.

  17. Yeah, I've been a little confused with people who are fans of Shephard's/Barney's/Chell's Mind, since we're just mimicking Ross Scott in the first place, so it's like having Hangers-On for Hangers-On.

    Maybe even Hangers-on for Hangers-on FOR Hangers-on if you consider that Freeman's Mind is really just a non-interactive reenactment of Half-life 1.

  18. @Random dude...stop that.

    @Psymon: rofl

  19. srcew tacos pan seared muffin shakes for everyone

  20. I say "twinky tacos." Sounds tasty, huh?

    -Random Vs Guy

  21. At 5:30 p.m. on September 10, Ian Riley officially became Ian: internet celebrity.


    This seems to be the path with any person who becomes popular on the interweb: First is a small base of loyal followers, then a huge base of random 12 year olds, then annoying 12 year olds on the internet bug the crap out of you, then you rant about said 12 year olds e-stalking you, then you either quit doing what makes you popular, or you continue on and resign to the fact that the internet is like the fast-food restaurant of culture: it appeals to the lowest common denominator of society and is readily accessed by everyone in the world, so you have to put up with the 12 year olds in order to continue to reach the original fan-base you created your content for in the first place.

    Welcome to step 4. :-P

    That's cool that you're coming out to Cali. Have you ever been here before? What part are you visiting?

  22. I've been to California before. They almost didn't let me in when I was two, because I didn't have a visa, when we only landed in LA to transfer flights to Auckland, since they don't fly London to Auckland directly. So that little incident cost the airline quite a bit to resolve hehehehe.

  23. As much of a fan I am, I don't think I'm crazed enough to pester. The closest I'll ever get is maybe seeing if I can join a game. If I wanna hear stuff like "I hate bee's" I can rewatch the episodes. That's usually enough to cover for me.

    I'd just talk causually about like video games, current events and such.

  24. @Janet: Never been to CA before, I'm going to be flying into San Fransisco and we're going to be in Sanoma.

    @Captainface: Yeah, that's what I think. I mean, I wouldn't mind saying one quote but any more than that is just silly, and I'd hate to do it all the time.

  25. @Ian

    Yeah, It's like people think your vocabulary consist of only those certain phrases. Although, no one ever recognizes me from anything cause I have no views, but, rather have that than crazed fans.

  26. @Ian: Even though I do consider myself crazed (hence the name) and I am a fan of your work, you don't need to worry about me going nuts. It also helps that I'm 22 years old and not 12.

    Having said that, there is no problem with being 12 years old. As I've said previously, it doesn't matter on your age, only on your actions.

  27. This comment has been removed by the author.

  28. I am 13(I will be 14 in September 14), but I am not a crazy fan who wants you to say "I hate bees". I am just a simple fan who likes your work and the other Masterminds' work. But, just like CrazedNighthawk said, it doesn't matter on your age, only on your actions.

    Also, for the 9th anniversary of 9/11, rest in peace to all those who died during that day.

  29. jesus.

    I mean, i've got nothing against fat people. but DAMN. bro needs to play football with friends... and get some real friends.

    gotta love krimsin's comment though.

    -ggamer (weighs 246 and squats 135)

  30. The only famous person I would want to say their famous line is Arnold Schwarzenegger. And I think we would all understand that.
    "I'll be back."

  31. ROFL! Krimsin's comments is amazing! Epic win my friend.

  32. Ya, I saw it. Sure, his comment was worth a chuckle in a sarcastic kind of way. But its not hilarious. But if you find it "rofl" funny then... ok.

  33. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  34. This comment has been removed by the author.

  35. hey ian whats new?

  36. @Anon: New girlfriend who is amazing. Going to California for a weekend in two weeks. Trying to get work done on Harrison's Mind and failing. (Been watching a lot of TV with my girlfriend so that's kind of cut into my hobbie time a bit.)

    Ummmm, not much else. Things are going pretty good.

  37. can you talk to curtis he's thinking of stoping felix mind

  38. Generic BM blog reader #642September 30, 2010 at 11:41 AM

    Wow. What the fuck was that? ''Holy crap! That kid is scary looking, I mean, wow, has he EVER gone outside? What the hell is wrong with his parents? Dude! Get some exercise! Run around! MOVE!''. Wow. I just can't believe anyone could that mean.

    What if that kid read that? Do you have any idea how he would feel? You probably do. But you didn't care. He played with you in a video game, and wanted to tell his fans. And you insult him and make him out to be a scary-looking weirdo.

    Good job, asshole.

  39. @Generic: Goodness, you're almost hilarious saying this: "Wow. I just can't believe anyone could that mean."

    I'm sorry, are you new to the internet or something? I'm being exceedingly nice the to the kid since 99% of anyone else on the internet would have flamed the guy. I actually genuinely feel sorry for the kid and don't want to hurt him any more than is necessary for him to realize that he needs to change his lifestyle big time.

    I'm being perfectly honest saying that and not mean in the slightest, that kid needs a wake up call. I'm not saying any of that to hurt him or anything, it's simply how I feel and I'm perfectly entitled to that opinion. How that kid lives right now is not healthy or normal, if this kid doesn't shape up he will never survive in society and will never be happy. He needs to get outside, lose some weight and get a life. I'm not being mean I'm just being brutally honest. If I wanted to be mean I would have told every one of my fans to go flame the kid.

    Also, I don't make the kid out to be a scary-looking weirdo, he IS a scary-looking weirdo. If he wants to post a creepy video like that then I have every right to go ballistic on him, which I didn't. Seriously, argue your point again and I'll prove you wrong by showing just what "mean" really is.

    In any case, if he reads this then I hope he has the good sense to take what I said to heart because he needs an intervention before he has a heart attack at age 24 while he's living in his parents basement surrounded by mountain dew cans.

    Good day sir.

  40. Generic BM blog reader #642September 30, 2010 at 5:27 PM

    First of all, I'd like to say I'm sorry for commenting on your blog under the influence of anger and I had a bit of a biased view because I video I uploaded which shall remain nameless was recently taken down by me, because it was just flaming and trolling from 90% of the people who saw it.

    Apparently, making videos on youtube being 13 years old is some sort of crime. Everyone was just being so mean just because I'm not fully... developed(?) saying things like My voice was so high it damaged their ears and I was going to grow up to become some freak with no life... just wow. 1:25 minutes of me talking into a camera is enough to get all that. I guess a lot of people are like that. :/

    When I read your post I was reminded of that, and my judgment and arguing/reasoning skills were probably clouded by my previous experience with exposing myself to the world, and how unfair most people seem. I'm sorry, after reading your post, I must admit I appear (and feel) quite the idiot.

    And yeah... don't think I haven't noticed 99% of the internet are assholes. I still can't get over that fact...

    Good day to you.

  41. Excellent, glad we got that worked out. Thanks for being reasonable, you have restored my faith in the younger generation for now.


  43. 11 year olds should not have access to the internet.